What What!

I got my hair chopped off again. It looks really cool and I can do a bunch of things with it. Right now it's pushed back because I just washed my face. I have a stupid bloody nose and I hope it clears up before grad tomorrow. I still have to do my nails and get the jewelery that I'm going to wear, etc etc.

I just reorganized my VHS movies in alphabetical order and stuck all the soft covers in one place and all the hard covers in another place. Thus my room is a mess. I'm going to rearrange some of my knickknacks because I can't rearrange my furniture. Well, I'm actually working on rearranging my furniture. I just have so much of it it isn't really practical to move it around but this set up is beginning to drive me a little loopy...

I'mma go do stuff.....

xoxo

Grad!

Well, I haven't been doing much with my time off. I've been watching a lot of room tours on youtube and I was going to do one but the batteries in my camera ran out--no word of a lie. I have batteries somewhere in my chest but I couldn't find them earlier today and it's too late to be rummaging about.
I'm graduating for the final time on Wednesday. I got a dress, gladiator sandals (yay!), and other stuff for the day. I'm kind of excited. I'm not a big fan of graduation ceremonies but I'm looking forward to seeing my OISE friends. I checked my grades today and I got a 4.0 with A's in all my classes. I'm glad because apparently the principal at Westside looks at grades first when he's considering who to hire.
I just felt like updating a little so there's not much to say. I may do a little experiment in description writing tomorrow and I'll post it if it's any good.
Ciao!

Ouch!

It's been ever so long. I forgot about this blog thing I had going. Just a quick update then.

I'm done school as in I'm not going back in September. I've got two degrees under my belt and now it's times to look for a job. There are a few job postings for LTO's at Westside which is where I would love to teach. It's just down the street from me and it's where I did my internship. It's a new building so it's really neat inside. The classrooms are huge and there are windows everywhere. It is such an open building. And it is a really great school in general. I'd have to set up a NSAP program and perhaps a debate club and student newspaper but I'd be willing to do that.

I've just been vegging out lately. I have to find a summer job really soon but it seems to keep getting postponed. i don't know what I want to do for the summer! I don't want to go back to Community Living Dufferin. I've had enough of them. When they get their act together I may consider doing part time work there but I don't see that happening anytime soon.

My weekends are spent at the trailer. We got a canoe so I've been paddling around the lake. Every Saturday we go to garage sales and I come back with tons of books and movies. I've run out of places to put them. I've already downgraded from a 3/4 bed to a twin but I still can't seem to find any room. My bookshelf is a mess; all the books are unorganized and crammed into every nook and cranny. I'm also running out of room for movies. (I collect VHS movies, if you didn't already know.) I'm beginning to think I have an addiction--at least it's not to drugs or alcohol.

There's tons more to say but I don't really like reading long blog entries so I'll cut it off here...

Here's a cool picture:



Ciao!
xoxo girlbehindthecurtain

Couldn't go this many days without a note

GAH!

I don't really have anything to say. I've wasted all my efforts on that stupid reflection last night: What does Catholic Education mean to you? Well, considering how these Catholic courses have fueled my already present distaste with the church, not much, at least not any more. How can a church that claims that "the entire church as the People of God shares Jesus' prophetic, priestly, and royal ministry" not take any action when a Priest participates in the genocidal massacre of people. It just astounds me. But I've already learned that when you criticize people you get a very cold response. People just don't want to change. We should throw tradition out the window and adapt with our ever changing world just as Jesus did.

The Pirate Bay is on trial and things seem to be going pretty well. The witnesses for the prosecution have no idea what they are taking about and after one took the stand people in the audio-listening room next to the court room were heard bursting into laughter because of his ineptitude. Hopefully it will be enough to win! Follow the court case here: http://torrentfreak.com/

In other news, I'm pretty much done with Grad House on Saturday. I'm trucking (vanning?) all my stuff home. So on top of designing two units, I'll have to unpack and rearrange my room. I can't wait to be out of this place. They interfere far too much in the life of their residents. I don't want people in my room when I'm not there. We are all Grad students and have some aptitude. Why can't you just trust us to keep our space clean? I don't need you to clean my furniture, especially when I have tons of random but important papers on my desk. Bah! My Mom doesn't clean my room at home and I don't need someone to do it for me when I'm at school. Haven't you heard of privacy? I pay money for this space!

So, I'll be home for a month but I'll be pretty much unavailable because, as I said, I have to teach two courses and I don't know how much planning I'll be able to do ahead of time. I'm hoping I'll be able to do a lot so we'll see after this weekend.

I got a twitter. I've been resisting to get one for a while because I didn't really see the point but I caved and got one. I update a lot because my life is pathetic and you need to hear about it.

I'm falling asleep and I need to work on my Philosophy of Education. So I'm going to live this here.


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Now playing: Cobra Starship - Kiss My Sass
via FoxyTunes

Protesting....What good does it do?

I've been trying to say for quite some time that peaceful protests are useless. They have never really propagated any real change unless they backed by violent uprisings. People often like to reference Ghandi and Martin Luther King as examples of peace bringing about change. However, at the same time that they were starving themselves (I never really understood how hunger strikes actually help...) and marching on Washington, violence was another factor in inciting change.

In India, there were a multitude of violent outbreaks that help incite Indian independence including the Anushilan Samiti and Jugantar.

During the civil rights era, the Black Panthers were a group that incited violence as a way of change.

The Vietnam War did not end because of pressure from protests. It went on for at least 16 years despite protests for about 13 years. I really don't think that 13 years of protest really had that much effect on the decision to remain in Vietnam. The reason they evacuated was more likely because they had been there too long and oil prices were too high to continue to fight a lost cause.

And then I turn to the current example. Through 8 years people have been protesting against George Bush but what has come of that? He was re-elected (and I don't care whether you think its legit or not, he's been in power there is no reason to squabble over how he got there) despite protest and God forbid that people keep thinking that protests are going to work if McCain gets elected.

And let's not forget the greatest example of all! (TANGENT: And this is where a lot of people are hypocritical. It's hilarious to see a peaceful protester exalt the likes of Che Guevara, whose very core was inciting violence around Latin America and eventually the Congo.) Cuba! Where the whole idea of change was violence. You march into town, blow up a few buildings, kill the right men, and the world (or at least Cuba) is a better place for it. (Let's just be clear I don't want to quibble over whether Castro and Che actually helped Cuba, I have my opinion and nothing is really going to change that. This is a piece about violence and protests--argue about that.)

I just want to make it clear that I am not inciting anyone to violence. I just wanted to point out something that I've been thinking a lot about. The reason I believe people protest is similar to the reason people donate to charities: it makes them feel like they are actually doing something. I've said over and over again that boycotts don't work. They just end up hurting the workers. We get angry at corporations for belittling people but we belittle them even further by suggesting that we have the solution to their problems. On top of that, we do not know the history of what these people have been through; it is very presumptuous to assume that we know what is right for them when all we really know is a tiny snippet of what is going on in their whole life. The histories of Latin America, of Africa, are far more complex than any regular Joe Shmoe could understand. I've been studying Latin America for 4 years and I have only begun to scratch the surface of what is a really wide and deep problem that a few protests and boycotts only enable. I've heard it said that "Compassion is just a nicer way of looking down your nose" (lyrics found in OKGo's What to Do) and I believe that is totally true.

-girl behind the curtain

p.s. I'm bitter, no hiding it, but don't disclaim my opinions because of that.

I challenge all of you to give me one example whereby a peaceful protest (by itself) has helped stop something (child labour, work camps, slavery, sweat shops, wars, etc). I would really like to hear an example so that I won't be so very bitter about all of this.

More of Nothing

I've been trying my darnedest to write a really eloquent piece about how science fiction is all about what it means to be human. But I keep making references that I'm sure people won't get. I'm not trying to sound pretentious but how many of you have watched Stargate Atlantis and how many of you have read Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut. My whole little piece would be bogged down with explaining episodes of SGA where wraiths challenge the meaning of being human. I think I'm coming to a slow conclusion that science fiction is a very elitist genre. If you haven't read it, watched it, or heard of it, then you don't belong in our little clique! Our brand of humour is only accessible to those who know the various references. Maybe that's why I like it. We all like belonging to an exclusive group, even if you deny it you are part of an exclusive group. There's no escaping it.

Anyways, I was just looking at my past postings and reading other people's blogs while loading Sanctuary episodes 2 & 3 as well as episodes of the Smoggies! What I'm trying to say is that I got bored and thought I'd write a little something here.

I'm under the belief that my computer is exhuming an addictive fume because I'm dreadfully bored of the internet and have a million other things to do but I can't seem to detach myself. I'm kind of torn as to whether the internet helps the world or if its just going to end up screwing us over. On the one hand we can get more access to news stories from around the world, which educates us as well as allows us to educate others, hopefully. But, and I don't mean to sound condescending (when really I do mean to be mean because apathy sucks), most people I know (looking at you facebook) don't use the Internet for anything but personal entertainment. Now, playing games, looking at hilarious pictures, and pirating are all great but there is a whole lot more out there.

The Internet has the capacity to erase apathy and ignorance and slowly we are losing it to the government who fears that we are going to learn about the world and get off our butts and do something about it. No one really cares about pirating (except those that pirate and the RIAA), they care about what access we can gain to knowledge. Yet, this wide access to knowledge, to ideas, to actual ways to change the world is not being used. Revolutions were fought before the Internet when the only way to spread news of injustices was by mouth and pamphlet if someone owned a printing press. Now people are too apathetic and lazy to even participate in a democratic way. It's very disappointing.

Wow, from science fiction to a rant on revolutions....

I was going to include a personal update but I very likely turned you all off. So return to your World of Warcraft, your "itunes", or go read a book!

xoxo
-girl behind the curtain


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Now playing: Fall Out Boy - Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet
via FoxyTunes

Now Here I Am...

Now here I am, the sum of my experiences, my beliefs and convictions, my hopes for the future.
Where was I years ago?

10 years ago...
I was 12, grade 8. I was angry, those who knew me can attest to that.

5 years ago...
I was 17, grade 12. I knew who I was; I had the answers to all the world's problems. I was immature.

Today...
I am almost 22, 5th year of university. I know more...

xoxo
-girl behind the curtain

Up to Date

Wow, life seems to go by fast when you actually get some time to just sit and think about it.

Where am I right now?

Well, I was just looking for a piece of paper with some data on it but I can't seem to find it. My room is a total mess. I have time to clean it, I just rather wouldn't. I feel like I'm in the need for more posters or artwork or something to decorate my room. It feels very sterile and impersonal. Maybe that's why I can't sleep. The zombies don't help either.

I dye grass...

So I'm in school, at U of T. My thoughts on Toronto? Hm. I love that its always busy; there's always someone out on the street. There's lots of new things to look at, somethings that I never thought I'd see anywhere but the internet. But apparently the internet has laid its bestial hands on Toronto. There's street art, public chess boards, giant statues, pubs. That is the third time the street cleaner has passed my window tonight. Toronto, for all its artsy and busy-ness, is actually quite predictable. Every night at 1015-10:30 the street cleaner comes by my window. Somewhere between 11:00 and 11:30 sirens pass. Then at around 12:45 a street racer zooms by. It would be a strange night when I don't hear those things. The windows and walls are not very capable of keeping noises outside. I never really feel silent. Restlessness of the soul, the ears, the body. I don't think I'd be able to live in Toronto. I need to take a breather every once in a while.

By the way, I'm the queen of digressions tonight.

The bags under my eyes are getting too heavy to carry but I'm not tired. I feel that I could stay up all week and still not feel tired.

Classes are okay. I feel like I'm in elementary school again. Never have I had teachers in high school or university that treated the students like little kids. I'm filling out charts and reading little anecdotes, getting off my butt and having digressive conversations. Better than aggressive conversations I guess.

I've become more confrontational with people. I can see why I used to not be keen on people. It's not necessarily there fault either. I believe I'm just argumentative by nature. My knee jerk reaction to most things is to disagree and that comes to people as well. I think I'm also a bit of a control freak.

I haven't exactly felt physically well since I've been at school again. Is it the Toronto air? Is it the thought of the impending future? Or is it the flu?

My fingers want to type more self-centered sentences. I'll hopefully be more coherent in the morning.

G'night!

-c.s.

Some Thoughts From Our Dear Friend Kurt Vonnegut

"Oh, I have what a lot of people would call communistic thoughts", said Eliot artlessly, "but for heaven's sakes, Father, nobody can work with the poor and not fall over Karl Marx from time to time--or just fall over the Bible as far as that goes. I think it's terrible the way people don't share things in this country. I think it's a heartless government that will let one baby be born owning a big piece of country, the way I was born, and let another baby be born without owning anything. The least a government could do, it seems to me, is to divide things up fairly among the babies. Life is hard enough, without people having to worry themselves sick about money, too. There's plenty for everybody in this country, if we'll only share more".

"And just what do you think that would do to incentive?"

"You mean fright about not getting enough to eat, about not being able to pay the doctor, about not being able to give your family nice clothes, a safe, cheerful, comfortable place to live, a decent education, and a few good times?"

-From God Bless You Mr Rosewater

This book is about a man who decides to love people unconditionally (unless of course they call him on the fire dept line). It is about the people who believe he is insane for this love. It is a very interesting treatise on American society and what the alternatives are.

-C.S.

The Catholic Church and Artificial Insemination

In between classes, I decided to grab a bite to eat and flip through one of my many textbooks. I decided to pick up a book called Twelve Tough Issues. It's by an Archbishop and discusses the Catholic policy on, you guessed it, 12 tough issues. Abortion, divorce, homosexuality, women, celibacy, all the things that you would expect to find in a book on religion and controversial issues are covered. But then I saw something interesting: a chapter on artificial conception. My first reasoning for this chapter being present before even reading it was that it was going to take about cloning. So I open to page 13 and read: "The insemination of a woman with the sperm of a man other than her husband is tantamount to adultery, even if both she and her husband consent to the procedure". He goes on to justify his moral objection: "To permit or procure anything else reduces the marriage partners to the status of consumers and the offspring to the level of a product". Even now I am trying to fight back the tears of anger. How Dare He!, my insides scream. With no Biblical backing he commits a hypocritical crime, reducing children of the world to commodities. I looked up the Catechism that backed this and found that reproducing via artificial insemination is found morally abject because it takes away the meaning of sex. Well I have a few things to say in my defense.

First of all, nothing in the Bible (to my knowledge) supports this outrageous statement. I know my Bible pretty well and unless there is some obscure reference to an Old Testament passage about artificial insemination then I don't believe there is anything. In fact, when I rack through my mind about relevant Bible passages, I can think only of ones that would support artificial insemination. I quote from the Message because it is in plain English but I have checked it against the NIV. Jesus says to his disciples: "Marriage isn't for everyone. Some from birth seemingly never give marriage a thought." (Matthew 19:11). As some of you may or may not know, I identify as asexual. I do not desire marriage; it's not in my life plans. Jesus seems to have hit the nail right on, some people want to marry, some people don't. Is it a coincidence that just 3 passages later Jesus says: "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these" (Matthew 19:14). Isn't considering artificial insemination hindering the children? People often cite this passage in the fight against abortion, so why can't the same beside in the fight to have children via artificial insemination?

Not only does this ideology of the church upset me religiously and personally but I can't believe they would reduce children to products. The feeling that I get from reading the chapter and the Catechism is that the church does not look favourably upon children born in this method, as if there was something wrong or inferior about these children. I don't see how any religion could shun the people that Jesus told us we must be like in order to enter the gates of heaven. The dignity of the human being and human life is shattered in artificial insemination according the church and Pope John Paul I's Donum Vitae. However, I believe the dignity of the human being is shattered, not by artificial insemination, but by such untutored, unfair, and unfounded statements. The article mentioned, Donum Vitae, was written only after the pope JPI met Louise Brown, the first baby born by in vitro. I see that as a personal attack not only on Louise, who was then just an infant, but on all subsequent children who were brought into this world, into the heart of Jesus, into the heaven of God through artificial insemination.

-C.S.